Title: LMoM #21 Monkey Day!: "On the Ship of Remus"
Pairing: Remus/Sirius, Remus/Monkey, Remus/Teddy, Remus/elf, Monkey/Snape, Everyone/kitty!Minerva, Remus/Tonks, Teddy/everyone, Peter/Kreacher.
Rating: NC-17
Kink(s): Bestiality, wanking, sounding, incest, crack, squick, SONGFIC.
Word Count: 550
Notes: All subtitles and summaries are names and descriptions of perfume oils from Black Phoenix Alchemy Lab and therefore belong to the BPAL powers that be. I'm merely fangirling them with Remus/Sirius pron. Deviating from BPAL in honor of Monkey Day!
And HP belongs to JKR, of course. Click on the pervy_werewolf tag of my username for previous entries.
Today's Scent Description/Summary: Dedicated to scribbulus_ink, enabled by snapelike, and set to "The Good Ship Venus" (Download and sing along!).


"On the Ship of Remus"

This month's daily_deviant fic is so, so very wrong. But apparently it is also rather cute? So I've been told. :P

The theme this month which I used was mucophagy- yeah, snot-eating. No one else had done it! Terribly shocking. So um- yeah- if you have a need to flail about chanting "ew ew ew", please read!


Title: "Snot On"
Author: pre_raphaelite1
Rating: NC-17 (So very, very wrong)
Pairing: Hagrid/Fang
Warnings/Kinks: rimming, bestiality, crack, Hagrid's crack, Severe Squickiness, Mucophagy (Someone had to do it.)
Summary: It wasn't Flitwick who came to him one Tuesday morning when everything was quiet but for the sounds of very wet and snotty grief echoing against the Castle walls and carried over the still lake.
Author's Notes: I blame this first of all on everyone who did NOT write mucophagy this month. Secondly on zevazo who suggested the pairing after I saw that Padfoot was getting lots of action this month. And finally on red_squared who was able to guess what I was writing by my assertions I was squicking myself- and who also gave me the title. And finally, I blame all insanity and mistakes on LMoM.

Fake Cut Alert!
"Snot On"

Title: Scentillation (Revisited): Lurid (#6)
Pairing: Remus/Sirius
Rating: NC-17
Kink(s): bestiality, rimming, dubcon, felching *sings* 'These are a few of my favourite things.'
Notes: All subtitles and summaries are names and descriptions of perfume oils from Black Phoenix Alchemy Lab and therefore belong to the BPAL powers that be. I'm merely fangirling them with Remus/Sirius pron. And HP belongs to JKR, of course. Click on the pervy_werewolf tag of my username for previous entries.
Today's Scent Description/Summary: Shocking, horrific, fierce, savage, sensationalized, luminous and hazy: black currant, Bulgarian lavender and white musk with a dollop of thick resin and a voltaic charge of ozone notes.

Fake Cut Alert!
Scentillation (Revisited): Lurid (#6)


First person to leave feedback gets to choose the BPAL scent as the prompt/inspiration for the next day’s ficlet! Should this not work out, I'll pick a reviewer at my discretion. Thanks to loony4lupin (again) for this one.

For LJ's Sopdetly:

( James/Lily/Padfoot )

For ladyblack88:
( Remus/Sirius )

For dannyyy:
( Hagrid/duck )


Enjoy. And don't forget to sign-up at hp_april_fools!

And here's your Day before the Day before Christmas sequel to "A Christmas Tale Sung by Wormtail the Rat... or Something Like That".


Title: "Voldemort's Christmas Carol"
Pairing: Lucius/Narcissa/Draco, Bella/Wormtail, Snape/Unicorn, DE Orgy, Voldie/Greyback?
Rating: R
Warnings/Kinks: Malfoycest, bestiality, crack, fisting, strap-ons
Author's Notes: I blame this on.. um... clumsy_goddess because I wrote it while in my underwear on her bed. And also snapelike. And- um... whoever asked for Snape/unicorn? Who was that? Lysa? Cnary? And cnary_crem_dght for the Snunicorn!
And for some moooood music, here's Nat King Cole's version of "Adeste Fideles"

( Voldemort's Christmas Carol )

Feedback is love!

And as promised, a wee ficlet for artisticentropy to her requested prompts of "Harry, a snake, and something plaid." Gee, it's me- what was she expecting? Genfic? :P

Title: "Twisted Sheets"
Pairing: Harry/snake
Rating: NC-17
Warnings/Kinks: bestiality, parseltongue

( Twisted Sheets )

Feedback is love!

Right- so this is probably the squickiest thing I've ever be involved in! And yes, I squicked myself at one part that I wrote.

I collaborated with two of the biggest perverts snapelike and cnary_crem_dght on a fic/art project for daily_deviant.

We are talking about giving prizes to people who make it all the way through our Christmas 'song'- set to the tune of "It Came Upon a Midnight Clear".

Go on. You all want to read it. We're being told that it's so squicky, we're going to hell it's hilarious.


Title: A Christmas Tale as Sung by Wormtail the Rat, or Something Like That...
Authors: pre_raphaelite1 and snapelike
Artist: cnary_crem_dght
Characters: Arthur, Ginny, Moony, Wormtail, Sirius, Regulus, Crookshanks, Mrs Norris
Rating: NC-17 and NWS
Warnings/Kinks: Songfic (sort of), crack (definitely), incest, chan, bestiality, cannibalism, rimming, snowballing, sounding, necrophilia, gang bang, non-con, dub-con, scat, prostitution and adultery, a bit of blasphemy- and generally yuckiness!
A/N: *cnary and lysa1 point at pre_raphaelite* 'It is all her fault!!!' OI! What? Am I the ONLY pervert around here? *cnary & lysa, nodding* Yes! *sighs theatrically* Alright.

Fake cut to Daily_Deviant!
"A Christmas Tale as Sung by Wormtail the Rat, or Something Like That..."


*pushes all of F-List toward it*
*totally pretends she's not playing on iJ and pimping porn while she's administering a final exam*

OMG... daily_deviant's theme this month was Fake Spoilers and crack. They provided 81 false spoilers for DH as prompts. I used THIRTY-FOUR. Plus a few more that should have been on the list. My brain hurts.


Title: "WRiNCL-on-Thyme"
Characters: Everyone? Remus/Sirius, Tonks/Ginny, Harry/Ron/Hermione, Albus/Gellert
Rating: R
Warnings/Kinks: CRACK! Excessive use of parentheses, implied bestiality and public sex, disturbing visuals of Hagrid
Summary: 34 of the 81 fake spoilers provided, plus a few more. Can you find them all? :P
Author's notes: I am so, so sorry, world. This is complete and total cracked-out crack, though there is sex in it! Briefly. Sort of. At least it's not my art? And I sporfled while writing- not sure if that bodes well or not.

Fake cut alert!
"WRiNCL-on-Thyme"

Commenters go to heaven!

Right- so I wrote this a while back for a CommuniQuills related festival but I never posted it to my journal? WTF? I've deprived my F-List of Goats?

*rectifies*

Title: “The Lust of the Goat”
Pairing: Aberforth Dumbledore and Alice Longbottom
Rating: PG-13
Warnings: Goats, Aberforth's willy, and a lemon reamer
Explanation: Er- the premise was a charity auction where you bought a person for chores

( The Lust of the Goat )

Feedback is love!

Well, I've finished out all of those Object Drabbles I took prompts for, but I'm dividing them up into 3 posts. So here's the first set.

All drabbles are R or NC-17 and are exactly 150 words of pervy goodness.


Title/Object: Chains
Pairing: Lucius/Remus
Rating: NC-17
For tabakat

( Chains )

Title/Object: Bamboo
Pairing: Snape/Hagrid
Rating: R
For dannyyy

( Bamboo )

Title/Object: Pencils
Pairing: Bill/OMC/OFC
Rating: R
For ladyblack888

( Pencils )

Title/Object: Ruler
Pairing: Moony/Arthur
Rating: NC-17
For snapelike

( Ruler )

Feedback is good for your soul.

This was comment fic for snapelike who probably didn't know I'd take her up on the prompt she mentioned. Muhahaha. I repost it here as a real post so I don't lose it. And so everyone can read it. :P

And anyone who wants to draw art of this? You will have my soul. Or fics. Or knickers. Or even naked pictures. :D


Title: "You Asked for It"
Pairing: Harry/Prongs (*sniggers*), James/Harry
Rating: NC-17
Warnings: Gay Incestuous Crossdressing Bestiality! (these are a few of my favourite thiiiiings!)

( You Asked for It )

Feedback will be groped.

This was written for daily_deviant but then DH and LJ blew up. So here it is now. This is snapelike's fault for the prompt and wildestranger for insisting I post it.

Title: The Doeful Gaze
Pairing: Aberforth/?
Rating: NC-17
Warnings: This is me. Want to guess? (No DH spoilers though)
Summary: He had always come to her with a smile, soft words and gentle hands. He knew how to touch her, how to caress her and stroke her as she needed.

( The Doeful Gaze )

Feedback will be snuggled in bed.

Title: Scentillation(31): All Night Long
Author: pre_raphaelite1
Rating: NC-17
Pairing: Remus/Sirius
Kink(s): Bondage, Bestiality, Felching, Dirty Talk, Watersex, Biting, Sex Toys, Sex Magic, Feather Play
Challenge: Lusty Month of May!
Word Count: 2300
Notes: As my present to everyone (and in celebration of making it through the month OMG!), I've written this fic in response to your requests of the following: comeplay, felching, rope bondage, a peacock feather, firewhiskey, ties, watersex, "slutpuppy", dirty talk, tattoos, biting, blackmail, glasses, "Harder, Moony", buttplug, motorbike. The bestiality is my contribution to the list. :P

All subtitles are names of perfume oils from Black Phoenix Alchemy Lab and therefore belong to the BPAL powers that be. And HP belongs to JKR, of course.

( Scentillation(31): All Night Long )


Link to Original Pervy Werewolf Post:
Scentillation(31): All Night Long

Many thanks to all my readers and reviewers! You are what kept me going. I honestly can't believe I did it. *collapses into brainless goo*

Title: Scentillation(20): Love-Lies-Bleeding
Author: pre_raphaelite1
Rating: R
Pairing: Remus/Sirius
Kink(s): Canine Hurt/Comfort
Challenge: Lusty Month of May!
Word Count: 750
Notes: All subtitles are names of perfume oils from Black Phoenix Alchemy Lab and therefore belong to the BPAL powers that be. And HP belongs to JKR, of course.

( Scentillation(20): Love-Lies-Bleeding )

Link to Original Pervy Werewolf Post:
Scentillation(20): Love-Lies-Bleeding

First person to leave feedback gets to choose the BPAL scent as the prompt/inspiration for the next day’s ficlet! Should this not work out, I'll pick a reviewer at my discretion. Thanks to ladyblack888 who is going to beat me for hitting her one and only squick for this one.

Alright, perverts.... here it is. The Fic of Squicky Doom. *giggles* It took me a while to edit it as this really did squick me when I wrote it.

Now I expect all you people who demanded I post it to go read and COMMENT! *loves*



Title: "Of Rats and Ribbons"
Author: pre_raphaelite1
Characters:Bella/Wormtail, Bella/Peter
Rating:NC-17
Warnings: Seriously High Squick Factor!
Kinks chosen: Death Eaters, Squick the Mods: Adultery, Bestiality, Fisting
Word Count: 1060
Summary: It was a small ribbon, thin and red, a gift from Rodolphus when he first courted her, tied gaily around a bouquet of night-blooming roses.
Author's notes: I consider myself to be very squick-free, and yet I squicked myself while writing this. I hope someone enjoys it. :P

( Of Rats and Ribbons )



"Of Rats and Ribbons"